This week at acupuncture, Kirk jazzed it up. He did the usual needle and meditation music bit, then added a little electricity to the needles in my neck. It felt like a small tapping at the base of my skull. He also asked if I had been using the meditation CD he gave me. I fibbed a little by saying I had meditated a few times over the week. I really did try several times, but I don't think I succeeded in any of those tries.
Kirk's big thing was consistency over length. He said he'd rather me try ten minutes a day than thirty minutes three times a week. He must have guessed my meditations weren't quite as fruitful as one would hope. Mostly they look like this:
Turn music on. Take a deep breath. Sit on bed. Close eyes. Think positive thoughts. Breathe. Wonder what I'm supposed to be thinking about. Try to remember/invent a mantra to repeat. I am the divinity who resides in me? Not ready for that kind of intensity. Think of quippy titles for the blog post about failed meditation. Compose rough draft of blog post about failed meditation. Deep breath. Try to listen to the music/white noise. Check iPod. Only three minutes in.
This goes on for maybe ten minutes, then I'll usually start reading or cleaning my room, headphones still in. If I'm listening to the music I'm still sort of meditating, right? Plus I have things that need to get done and roommates demanding attention. I'll keep you posted if I ever reach Nirvana.