Grammys 2014

The Grammys are on tonight - 7 pm, my time. Because they are music awards, I'm more excited for the performances than for the actual awards (we only see a fraction of them being awarded anyways). I know a lot of people are unimpressed or downright confused by the seemingly random collaborations, but I'm game for nearly any mash-up of voices and songs. Why not?

If you're watching tonight, I'd love it if you joined me here as well. I'll be spouting off my thoughts and opinions on the performances, outfits, and even the winners (and losers). Until then, stay warm!

10:45 - Good Night!

Thanks for joining me for this award show that only presented, what...four, five awards? CPS cancelled school tomorrow, but as of now I'm still working. Off to bed!

10:35 - Album of the Year/End of Show

Album of the Year: Random Access Memories, Daft Punk. I think Taylor Swift looked genuinely shocked that she didn't win. This album wasn't even Daft Punk's best stuff, so it is surprising that they won in a tough category.

NIN/QOTSA/Lindsay Buckingham in a performance I don't quite understand, but still don't mind? It's too bad they have to be played over by the credits.

10:20 - In Memoriam and Miranda Lambert/Billy Joe Armstrong

Check out that glitzy piano. I wanted Lang Lang to play the entire In Memoriam.

Somehow both Miranda and Billy Joe's voices lend well to the Everlys.

10:05 - "Same Love" and 33 Weddings

Macklemore and Ryan Lewis with Mary Lambert singing a great song with a great message, if you discount all the times where Macklemore has to reassure us that he, himself, is not gay. I appreciate Mary Lambert's appearance, not only because she is gay, but because she is from Seattle, like Macklemore.

I wonder what the actual weddings of these couples will be like? Or how many of them were already married? Or how many won't have any other ceremony besides the Grammys?

Wow. Madonna is not doing herself any favors with that cane. She already looks like she rose from the grave to sing this song. And Mary sounds so much better than her.

9:49 - Metallica/Lang Lang and Daft Punk again

Here's another collaboration I might use as a bathroom break. I like the fire.

Steven Tyler, what a lovable old lady man.

Record of the Year: (not to be confused with Song of the Year, which is the actual song part) "Get Lucky" for what really is a great recording--music, lyrics, digital effects.

9:36 - Carole King/Sarah Bareilles and more Lorde

Here's hoping this version of "Brave" is better than the People's Choice Awards....yep. So far it is. I mean, Carole King helps A LOT.

Song of the Year: "Royals," Lorde. I'm glad it went to her. She could use some help with that posture, but congrats nonetheless.

9:15 - Country music and Daft Punk/Pharrell/Nile Rodgers/Stevie Wonder

Jeremy Renner looks like a smudgy pencil eraser.

Note: not watching this part. More country. Can't do it.

Awww, look at Taylor making sure to be the first clapping/standing up for Kacey. Can we rename The Grammys to The Taylors?

Pharrell, is that a different hat? He's still adorable. He looks totally psyched to be performing.

Wow, Steven Tyler dancing in the audience.

9 - The Beatles and Bruno Mars

Julia Roberts: your legs look good, but you don't look comfortable walking in those heels.

Paul McCartney and Ringo Starr: always legendary, but do The Beatles need acknowledgement every year? I'm a little bored, and it looks like the audience is too.

Gloria Estefan looks great. Beautiful dress.

Best Pop Vocal Album: Unorthodox Jukebox, Bruno Mars. Ummm...I guess he's okay. He's performing at the Super Bowl, he's easy to listen to, his songs are ALWAYS on the radio...that's all I got.

8:45 - Imagine Dragons/Kendrick Lamar and Kacey Musgraves

I love the weird collaborations. And Taylor, I'm back to hating you (just for this song, probably)...white girl to white girl, please stop. A music critic just referred to Imagine Dragons as an "edgier Coldplay." Maybe? I'll go with it. The camera feels a little trippy, but I like the jam session feel.

Kacey Musgraves has lights on her boots, so I can't take this performance seriously. I would probably like "Follow Your Arrow" if it wasn't so country/if someone else sang it.

8:30 - Ringo Starr and Jay-Z

Sorry, I missed the first part of Ringo Starr...I switched over to ABC to see Catherine walk up the aisle in The Bachelor's Live Wedding. Just note, these shows have both been on for 1.5 hours. We've seen three awards and the bride is only just walking up the aisle. Filler much?

Best Rap Collaboration: "Holy Grail," Jay-Z featuring Justin Timberlake...another rad tux. "Daddy got a gold sippy cup for you." Haha.

8:15 - Pink/Nate Ruess and Lorde again

Alright, I can get behind this. Is Pink really singing and doing acrobatics? She's got to be real fit for that. And not afraid of heights or susceptible to vertigo or anything. This is competition-level choreographed contemporary dance. She is definitely breathing heavily. Real stuff. ...and now onto the song I like better, but I can't enjoy it because Nate Ruess's entire look is creeping me out. My my, that mustache. Pink's vocals are ON POINT. She must do cardio.

Best Pop Solo Performance: (featuring youtube covers for the nominee packages) - Lorde, "Royals." She looks very tall and awkward, like most 17-year old girls. So, at least that was an age-appropriate acceptance speech (despite her very mature songs).

8 - John Legend and Taylor Swift

This camera work is weird. I'm really distracted by whoever the the spotlight is shining on as we pan back and forth. Unfortunate, because this John Legend song is super sweet. It deserves this standing ovation!

Kevin Hart's tux is awesome. Gold weave. So Classy.

Best Rock Song: Dave Grohl, Paul McCartney, etc, etc...remember when Dave Grohl was in Chicago recently and apparently it was a big deal? Man he barely let Paul talk.

I can never decide if I love or hate Taylor Swift. Right now it's love. Not this song, necessarily, but her aura.  Great dress, I love the hair (my hair)...and the drop! Okay, the initial part was a little exorcist-y, but I'm not about to judge a performer for performing. No one really looks awesome rocking out on the piano.

7:45 - Robin Thicke/Chicago and Keith Urban/Gary Clark, Jr.

Robin Thicke is a talented singer. It's too bad his reputation will hang on "Blurred Lines," a song I think was blown out of proportion (proportions not helped by its distasteful music video). Chicago is a very different collaborator than Miley Cyrus was at the VMAs, that's for sure.

I'll take a million Robin Thicke/Chicago mash-ups over anything country, but the guitar solos/duets are okay with me.

Can I just say I have Taylor's hair cut?

7:25 - HH/Katy Perry

Four words in and I'm already over this Hunter Hayes song.

Pop Duo/Group Performance: "Get Lucky," possibly one of the few summer hits I didn't get sick of. Pharrell is a great singer (he was the best part of "Blurred Lines," by far). Daft Punk are just great musicians in general (also that could be anyone under those helmets). I don't know much about Nile Rodgers, but I really enjoyed him in the music video!

Katy Perry and Juicy J--I really like this song. I think it would make a great wedding song, only sort of kidding. "once you're mine, there's no going back"--right?

7 pm - Show Opener/Keeping Expectations Low

Ahhh, already The Grammys are controversial. This is why it's such a low-rated awards show, compared to other awards shows. People weren't happy with the nominees, and they definitely aren't happy with the winners (so far). In reality there are only a few awards left to hand out, and I'm mostly here for the performances--starting with this show opener: Beyonce.

It's nice that she gets to start us off, especially considering her surprise album came out too late for Grammy consideration. I like the idea of this song: first she was "Crazy in Love," now she's "Drunk in Love." I love Jay-Z joining her onstage, because that's awesome for them. I'm not in love with this song. To be honest, I haven't really gotten into any of the songs on this album. I would apologize, but I'm sure Beyonce is fine.

I would love a performance by Anna Kendrick. Or just some stand up.

Best New Artist: I wonder what defines an artist as "new" because, some of these guys are newer than others. Macklemore & Ryan Lewis: not exactly new. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy these guys. I don't believe they are the "Best" or "New" Artists.

Lorde: Here's a lady who should've A) been nominated for Best New Artist and B) won. I LOVE that she is wearing clothes.