Sunday, January 15, 2012

NoWhere/NowHere

After a string of delayed buses, inconsistent bus tracker times, and consistent bogus route placements, I decided to end my five month relationship with the 49/Western bus. I considered breaking things off for some time; walking 1.5 miles and waiting 40 minutes in the freezing snow to find a working bus the other night forced the issue.

We had some good times, but these past few weeks we've only rehashed the same old fight. Nothing gets resolved and nothing changes. I let the 49 know I thought it was time I saw other public transportation routes. My new commute does include a bus transfer, so I'm splitting my time between two routes, but there is far less walking. So far so good.

The night of the break-up, during which I began to tear up until I remembered it was below freezing out, I went to my new yoga class. Yoga classes have a lot of catchphrases (technically I guess they'd be mantras, but if the teacher isn't genuine you can totally tell s/he learned this phrase during training) and in this particular yoga studio, theirs is "There's nowhere to go here. Nowhere to be." They mean it physically--if you're in the class, presumably you have no other obligations or places to go--but there's also a spiritual/emotional side to this mantra. We should be with our bodies where they are at, being present and intentional in the moment instead of letting our minds rush around with rambling thoughts.

I've been thinking about that whenever I go somewhere now. True, if I'm headed to work, there really is somewhere to go, somewhere to be. Other times I'm impatient for the sake of impatience--I'm just antsy, thinking if I keep moving I'm being productive. I need to remember in those times to bring my intentional presence to the spaces I enter. (MercyWorks, Always Has)

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